Monday, March 30, 2015

Am I Nesting?

I’m not nesting because I’m definitely not pregnant, but a couple of weeks ago I did do a home project - oh, it was during spring break - and I organized a mess that desperately needed to be organized. This is what happens when I watch too much HGTV.

So, this is what our living room used to look like:

The living room contains the fireplace, cabinets, the baby grand, my work area, kids’ homework supplies and craft area. It was trying to be too many things at once, for sure! And it was over-crowded and didn’t work. It hasn’t been working since Sophie and I moved in here with Jeff. So, I FINALLY fixed it!

NOW, look at how much space we have:

Notice that not only did I remove the two bookcases, I also got rid of the ‘holding’ area for the crap on either end of the fireplaces. And I recycled the two printers that had been sitting ON our fireplace for months. 

So. much. better.

There are PLENTY of other house projects left to do (including the GIANT whole going down the stairs) - if you own a home, you know they are never done. We are still talking about and saving up for the kitchen; the backyard needs a retaining wall replaced; the bedroom doors need painted - I wanted to go with frosted doors like this:
but Jeff said no, because our hallway is too narrow and the bedrooms too close and it won’t give enough privacy or block enough light. 

I would love to replace our closet doors and oh yeah - PUT in a door to the master bathroom. 

That’s not the end of the list, of course, but it’s enough for now.


Prozac is working! I heart it! I cannot tell you what a relief it is - I did not get depressed or want to kill myself and I did not even have the urge to kill anyone else! It’s just such a relief. Sure, I still got some of the regular PMS symptoms: hunger, exhaustion and irritability - but NOTHING like what I had been experiencing for the past year. 

I can be a normal person!

As long as I take enough drugs.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Instagram Woes

So Marcy let Ethan get on Instagram because “all the cool kids were doing it.” No, seriously, I’m not exaggerating. That was her reasoning. According to the Instagram rules, you are supposed to be at least 13 years old. I personally (and this is not to judge you if you feel differently) don’t think Instagram is appropriate for a 10 year old. The kids will get into social media soon enough; then they will become obsessed with it because that is how kids their age communicate, so WHY start it any earlier??

Anyway I expressed my opinion in the beginning and Jeff just kind of shrugged it off. Until. Until one day Ethan wanted to access his Instagram account but forgot to bring his iPod over so asked Jeff if he could do it on his phone and then Jeff kept him logged in and after the kids were asleep, Jeff was scrolling through it and was like holy hell this is ridiculous. First problem was Ethan’s screen name was Ethan_[last name]. Great. Fabulous. He was following girls who were 12 and posting videos of them gabbing going “Omigod you are such a slut! [giggle giggle giggle].” What Ethan was posting out there was completely appropriate; mostly selfies and pics of Kylie. But we found out he was following a kid who wanted to commit suicide, and then my friend Kim who teaches middle school taught me how to check if location was on because if it is you can click this little map icon on any photo and see exactly where the person took it, like down to the cross streets. So if a kid is posting selfies at home and has that turned on; you guessed it: practically anyone can figure out where that kid lives. Oh yes, that’s safe. Real safe. Thank GOODNESS Ethan did NOT have that turned on. 

Jeff got pissed and laid into Marcy about the account, now that he saw what it was all about. The thing that bugs me THE MOST is that Marcy herself, the parent who permitted Ethan to get ON the site in the first place, NEVER ONCE BOTHERED TO CHECK AND SEE WHAT HE WAS DOING ON IT. Dude, if you are going to allow young kids (or any age, actually) ON social media, you need to know what is going on there. I know many parents debate about it - -privacy and all that and kids have to have some privacy and back in our day it was journals and now it is texting, etc. but I believe my mom DID read my journals and there is no way I’m NOT going to monitor Sophie’s social media activity and yes I will be transparent and upfront about it. Anyway, especially when your kid is only 10, and it’s his first experience with social media, you, as the parent, should absolutely have access to the account and should monitor it. 

Anyway, Jeff gave into Marcy but they did make Ethan change his screen name and get his full name off of there. Jeff continues to monitor his account and enjoys marking others’ posts (people following Ethan) as inappropriate when the case is warranted. 

I wanted to say “I told you so” but I bit my tongue. 
Sophie gave Ethan a “lecture” about being on Instagram in the first place because she is a goody-goody two shoes rule follower and if the rules state “must be 13” then that is what she is going to go by. Which she also knows that doesn’t mean she automatically gets an Instagram account when she turns 13. 

I am tech savvy but this whole young-kids-on-social-media thing scares me. So many private conversations kids can have, whereas back in my day, all my mom had to do was stand on the other side of my bedroom door to hear what I was talking about. Not to mention that when I was in school, a mean girl really had to make an effort to spread rumors or gossip. You had to talk to people, you had to write notes and pass them around, you had to get people on your side. Now you just type and press SEND and voila - it’s all over the school. No effort and disastrous effects.

If you are parenting a tween or teenager and have any advice on the social media world and what you do to monitor, what you allow, what to watch out for, etc., I’m all ears.

Ethan in 25 Years

I love this. Jeff was at Ethan’s parent-teacher conference the other week and snapped a photo of this assignment which was displayed on the wall; apparently the kids had to write about what their life will be like in 25 years. Here is what Ethan said:
What I will be like in 25 years
“My life will be very different in 25 years. I will be married and have three kids: Lucas, Jack and Ashley. I will go to Mizzou for college and study sports. I want to be a MLB player because it’s fun and I get payed [sic] a lot of money. My favorite food will be salad, cheeseburger and bacon. My favorite things to do will be play baseball. My life will be great in 25 years.”
I love that he already has his kids’ named (after his BFFs and a girl he has a crush on). I’m worried that our retirement is dependent on Ethan becoming a major league baseball player and Sophie becoming an actress. We *might* need a back up plan. 

Experiment: FAILED

Yesterday Jamie and I got our wires crossed - I thought he was taking Sophie during the DAY but he just thought from 3:30 on. So then Jeff was taking off so Ethan could have his BFF Jack over (the boys have been together at Marcy’s non-stop since Thursday - yes, going on 6 days - we call Jack our “Friday night son” because he comes over every Friday night we have Ethan, and apparently he spends the other Friday nights at Marcy’s) and because I had to drop Sophie off early at her Musical Theater rehearsal, I just decided to work from home. 

Now Sophie can be LOUD. She can be one of the loudest in our family, though we are all pretty loud. But she is used to me working from home so she is also good at doing quiet activities while I’m on a conference call or whatever - coloring, reading, crafting, etc. And she is good when she has a friend over - they either go outside or downstairs in Sophie’s playroom to play school or American Girl Dolls. So it’s not totally Ethan’s fault or anything, I don’t want to sound like I am harping on him but cap guns and stomping around and chasing the dog and sliding down the hall and slamming doors (on accident, not because he was mad but the door coming into the house from the garage is heavy and slams easily if you are not careful), etc. well let’s just say it was EXTREMELY difficult to concentrate. 

The good news is that all three kids played basketball outside for quite a while and did sidewalk chalk. 

Yesterday overall was frustrating because this also happened:
That is the electric panel to the furnace in my old house - the one I’m renting. My renter called me about it - she is awesome; I hardly ever hear from her and get paid on time each month - she came home from work and smelled smoke, burning; she traced the smell, turned off the heater, opened the panel, saw sparks and melted wires. Basically, my entire house could have burned down. Thankfully Jeff has a friend that is a heating/cooling guy and he is coming to the house today but I am 99% sure I will need to dip into savings to purchase a new furnace. That sucks but at least I have savings. I couldn’t find through my paper work how old that thing is either but I’m just thankful my renter is smart and aware and that my house didn’t burn to the ground and that nobody was hurt.

Thursday, March 12, 2015

The Birds & the Bees

Last week we received a letter in the mail from the school, saying that the 4th graders (i.e. Sophie) were going to watch a movie called “Just Around the Corner.” They split up the girls and the boys and that is the name of the girls’ movie. We know about it already though because Sophie’s BFF Taylor that is in 5th grade already told us about it since she watched it last year and said it was so corny and lame and from like 1980. I bet it could even be the same movie *I* watched in 6th grade.

Anyway, I gave Jamie a heads up and he was ALL about it. Oh, btw: the letter came home and you could sign the form and send it back if you did NOT want your child to participate. I don’t even think they are really talking about sex, I think they are talking about puberty and changes they can expect to happen in their bodies. Taylor informed us that in 5th grade, the girls learn what the boys go through and the boys learn what the girls go through.
*Tangent:* I have to share this story. It’s not my story, but it’s about my friend’s son; we’ll call him “J.”
So J is in 5th or 6th grade and yes he learned this year what the girls go through. He came home and literally told his mom, “I’m so sorry you had to go through that.” Mom was flabbergasted and pleasantly surprised, until her son revealed that he though girls only had to go through that ONCE. Once in their lifetime, not every g-damn month! THEN he was even more horrified and said something to the effect of “No wonder you get so cranky!” True that.
*End Tangent*

Okay so Jamie was all about it and he planned to sit Sophie down on Wednesday and talk to her about sex. I told him to go for it and have fun.
Then I told Sophie her dad was going to do that and she said, “Well then I’m not going over there on Wednesday and I said oh yes you are.” (I just wanted her to prepare herself for that talk by letting her know – she is an anxious kid and hates surprises but no, she was not getting out of it).
Then I started teasing Sophie about puberty and asking if she wanted to talk about it and did she have any questions for me and her face would turn bright red and she would say “Stop it!”

So Jamie gave me the run-down of how it went last night. He wrote down six questions; questions like, “What changes can I expect in my body” and “How are babies made” and told Sophie to pick which one she wanted to tackle tonight. Her response was, “Oh I know all of that already.” So Jamie called her on it (which I appreciated – oh and yes he had TT there for support and to speak from the woman’s point of view) and said, “Okay, well then why don’t you tell me what you know about how babies are made.”
Sophie’s answer? “Mommies and Daddies give each other a special hug.”
I joked with Jamie, “Wow; that must be one REALLY special hug.”
Anyway, he told her about eggs and sperm and didn’t go into great detail about how the sperm got into the egg, just that it has to in order to fertilize it and create a baby. She was pretty freaked out by the fact of eggs floating around inside her but Jamie told her that humans don’t LAY eggs like chickens. I could just imagine Sophie thinking that.
I mean WHO KNOWS what kind of mis-information these kids get from their peers, TV, internet, older siblings.

So it wasn’t - just to get something straight: it wasn’t that I *DIDN’T* want to talk to Sophie about this stuff so I let Jamie do it; it’s just that a)I wasn’t sure how b)I wanted to do it on my own timetable, not forced into a timetable by Jamie or the school. Besides, he volunteered and frankly? No, I don’t feel guilty because I do all the OTHER hard stuff. I find all the doctors, all the daycares, I plan all the summers, I ensure all vaccinations are up to date, etc. So, he can do something hard for once, I don’t mind. (I’m sure I’ll get - and will welcome - questions from Sophie tonight.)

If you have any advice on how to do this – if you have been through this – let me know. Most of my sex education was via watching Lifetime movies with my mom and her forcefully stating her opinion on what went down (i.e. “You see, stupid girls fall in love and aren’t safe and fall for whatever lies the guys tell them and then they end up pregnant but you betcha’ I’m not going to be raising an infant while you’re off partying so you better be smart…” Yeah, she was pretty scary).

I did read, “Are you there, God? It’s me, Margaret.” And I know from Sophie that TT’s education was “My parents threw a book at me and said, ‘here, read this’” and a couple of months ago Sophie said, “I hope you don’t just throw a book at me.” She *wants* to talk about it, but she doesn’t because it’s awkward and embarrassing.

To end on a funny note though – if you have not seen this clip from “Weeds” I highly suggest you watch it. The Uncle is telling the son of Mary-Louise Parker how to properly masturbate and it is the best, funniest thing ever. I think it’s something Jeff is probably overdue showing Ethan as much as I shudder at the thought…(BLAH!)

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Happy, Happy, Happy

PMS is just around the corner but the sun is shining here and it smells like Spring. Here are some things making me very happy today:
Cute Kids
I like to start my day with comedy; I usually look up some favorite comedians on YouTube via the iPad while I’m straightening my hair in the morning (one of my favorites is Brian Regan). The other day I looked up “Ellen” and found a couple of clips of kids on her show; my favorite was Noah. I almost peed my pants watching this (part 1) and this (part 2). Seriously, I want to eat this kid up.

I called down Sophie to come and watch the clip with me and ever since she’s been obsessed. Both her and Ethan have watched it multiple times. Also, there was this:
Sophie: Wait, Ellen Degeneres? That’s her name? Oh, I always thought she was called “Ellen The Generous” because she’s so generous!

Sunday marked my one year wedding anniversary. I just can’t believe it’s already been a year! Only 39 more to go…(Jeff turns 48 this year…)

Cousin David
My cousin David, who just spent the past 1.5 years in Alaska, and is an avid traveler and has been all around the world including India, South America, Kashmir, etc., came down to St. Louis for a visit from Sunday evening to early this morning. I haven’t seen him in years and it was wonderful to do so. Growing up, me, David, his sister Jessica and my Aunt Stephanie (my Mom’s sister) went on many a family vacation together – including one year: a cruise to the Caribbean.

When we were little, David used to call me “FooFoo” and said he would marry me one day:) He’s four years younger than me, and our birthdays are only a week apart! Jessica is six years younger than me and we tend to get hysterical/delirious when we are together, which is a lot of fun. David’s homebase (where Mom and Jessica live) is Connecticut, and I am actually going to visit Jessica over Memorial Day weekend to see her, and visit with her husband and her new baby girl (Luna, 7 months). We’ll also be celebrating Jessica’s birthday that weekend. Me and Aunt Stephanie have a job to do: Convince my mom to fly with me. Stephanie and my mom can hang out and watch the baby while me and Jess go party in NYC!:)

The only two bummers during David’s visit was that a)I had to work [but at least I could do so from home] and b)Sophie had a mild stomach bug [it’s been going around, apparently] and was home from school Monday-Tuesday. It kind of worked out in that at least David was there to help entertain her, but Sophie only has a 4 day week this week anyway and then is off for Spring Break.
Yesterday David took my car and headed down to my parents’ to spend some QT with them, which I know they appreciated. AND he made me his “famous” breakfast burritos – that guy is a whiz in the kitchen – which was so incredibly delicious I wanted to hire him on as my permanent cook! I may or may not see David again over Memorial Day because yep, you guessed it – he will likely be off on another adventure by then (plan is Niagara Falls, Ontario).
Sophie has a lot of Jessica-like characteristics, including the ‘performance factor’ and ‘loudness factor.’

People say David and I look more like brother and sister than he and Jessica; that’s because David takes after our moms’ side and Jessica after her dad’s.
Cousin David has Alopecia Areata, like my mom. He got it at 3 years old and my mom at 52.
The Loud Family
Speaking of the loudness factor – I KNOW this is the pot calling the kettle black but holy hell are my kids loud. So we invited Jeff’s mom and my parents over for dinner on Saturday, and seriously I cannot even BEGIN to tell you how many times either me or Jeff shouted “VOLUME!!!” So then Jeff showed us this 1978 clip from a Saturday Night Live Skit. Watch it and welcome to our home.

Ruelle Family/Travel Tips
Today I booked a flight to Portland, OR to visit The RuelleFamily in April:)
I found a REALLY cheap flight on Frontier; I had an air fare alert out that would email me pricing once a week; but then when I dug into it, I discovered that:
Frontier CHARGES you just for a regular old seat! $4 for each seat on each plane for each leg; since I had a layover each way, this would have been an additional $16.

Frontier, like most airlines, also charges you to check baggage; add another $50 total. So now instead of a $300 RT fare, it was now a $366 RT fare. Not to mention that I HATE flying Frontier because one time I had a REALLY bad experience and yes that’s all it took. Southwest had a flight for $383 – higher sure, but no seat fees and no baggage fees, and it is one of my favorite airlines to fly. Then I found a Delta flight (which ranked high last year in customer satisfaction) for $364 and if I carry on, that will be the price. It was more convenient dates/times for me, so that’s what I chose.
With our tax refund, my savings, and my parents’ generous anniversary gift, we are closer to having the funding ready for our kitchen. Jeff has been crunching the numbers and if we do some of the demo ourselves (sounds super fun to me!), we might just be able to make this happen in Q2. We might actually want to have people over!
I Need an Interior Decorator
You would think with all of the HGTV I watch, I would really be able to put some of the wonderful decorating ideas into practice in my own home. All it takes is money, time and creative vision, right? But uh, no. Seriously, I think our house could be incredibly awesome with the right touch ups and decorating. But I don’t have a damn clue how to go about it. SIGH. Any volunteers? :)

Okay, now I’m just rambling so I’m signing off…I hope the sun keeps shining:) Oh, but here's one PS just to make you smile because she is so damn cute:

Thursday, March 05, 2015

I’m Obsessed with “Invisibilia”

I am OBSESSED with NPR’s “Invisibilia” show. It’s new and they did 6 episodes and I have listened to every single one, usually in the mornings while I’m straightening my hair, and I was really sad when they were all done as I found them absolutely FASCINATING. NPR describes the show as one that “explores the intangible forces that shape human behavior – things like ideas, beliefs, assumptions and emotions.”

You can download the podcasts on iTunes as well. This show is where I first heard about “Ghost Boy” and later purchased, read and loved the book. 
There was a show titled “Entanglement” about a woman who literally can feel what others around her are feeling. If someone near her is getting hugged, she feels as if she is getting hugged. If she watches someone fall and break his/her leg, HER leg is in excruciating pain. It caused all kinds of problems - making a trip to the grocery store mentally and physically exhausting and pretty much turning her into a recluse - but it was fascinating nonetheless. The scientific hypothesis behind entanglement made me think of how you become best friends with someone, or find a lover. Sometimes you just immediately “click” with someone. Maybe it’s ‘chemistry’; maybe it’s a lesser degree of entanglement - your atoms, neurons, matter connecting with someone else’s. Okay, it makes NO sense if you haven’t heard the program and I would have to listen to it again and have a discussion group as the points were being brought up (NPR should start an online discussion group for its Invisibilia shows).

Oh, and then there was one show about a woman who truly could not experience the emotion of fear. Scientists have studied her for like 20 years and she experiences other typical human emotions like sadness, happiness, love, laughter, but just not fear, and it’s because her amygdala is different. Anyway, she’s prone to people taking advantage of her and was at one point held up at knifepoint or gunpoint to which she told the guy “Go ahead and kill me, and then I will come back and HAUNT the ever living shit out of you” or something like that which I thought was brilliant (The guy let her go, but don’t try that at home folks. Or at least don’t try it, have it not work, and then blame me. That’s really what I’m getting at here). Anyway, it also explored how when our parents were growing up and those growing up in the 60s, 70s, and into the 80s, it wasn’t unusual to have a couple of 5 and 7 year olds wandering the woods/creek behind the houses until dusk. Today, parents call 9-1-1 on other parents if they see a kid alone. (And that’s all I’m willing to say about THAT debate today, right now).

Another show I really loved was about how a blind guy (Daniel Kish) learned echolocation in order to get around in the world. Like bats do. And he can RIDE A BIKE for miles and then he decided to teach other blind folks how to do echolocation. 

And of course, I was very much into “The Secret History of Thoughts” which one of my dear readers kindly suggested to me during my very ‘blue’ time recently. 

Anyway, I’m fascinated by anything that combines science, psychology, human behavior and how the brain works, and if you are too, you would really enjoy “Invisibilia.” I can’t wait till the next season!

PS - NPR did not ask me or approach me or pay me to say any of this as I think is clear by my very drafty summaries of the episodes. I’m just a big dork and love sharing my new obsessions. 


For Valentine’s Day, Jeff got the kids - and me - each a special gift: custom t-shirts. Here are the kids wearing theirs, and I am wearing mine today as well (bright pink!) which says, “I love my crazy husband.” Sophie wants us to ALL wear them when we go to Chicago this summer. 

Jeff was debating in the store what to put on Sophie’s. He didn’t want to say “Dad” and definitely not “step-dad” because it sounds so…distant? That’s why he made a better decision and got Sophie’s shirt to say “I love my crazy Poopy,” because that’s what Sophie calls him, and has since almost the beginning. He was teasing her one day and called her “wipeless” and she said “oh yeah well if you’re going to call me ‘wipeless’ I’m going to call you ‘Poopy!’”

When Jamie saw it, he goes, “Well, you can’t wear that out in public.” I told Jeff that later and he was all, “Why not?” I think Jamie is jealous that Sophie has a special nickname for Jeffrey. It’s okay for him that she has a special nickname for Jenn (“TT”) but now having a special name for another man in her life…well, I’m speculating here but I told Jamie, “At least the shirt doesn’t say “I love my crazy poop!”

Speaking of poop. Here is a story of all stories, but please don’t be eating, about to eat, or have just had a meal when you read this. Jeff calls it “a story that will tie this family together forever, one we will tell again and again.” Apparently this family REALLY enjoys talking about poop. Okay, here’s what happened, I shit you not (pun intended).

Tuesday. Kylie had diarrhea in the early evening and it was gross and Jeff cleaned it up. Jeff is in Ethan’s room putting him to bed and I’m in Sophie’s room putting her to bed. (Don’t even GET me started on how our kids are TEN and we have to put them to bed. And lie with them until they fall asleep. It’s total B.S.). We are lying down and reading. Kylie comes in and wants to be up on the bed so I pick her up and hold her. She lies down and is snuggly. I have her in the crook of my arm, Sophie next to me, and I’m scrolling through the news headlines on the iPad with one hand. Then Kylie starts trying to get up and I hold her tighter because I think she is just going to try to eat one of Sophie’s socks or stuffed animals that are on the floor. Then Kylie starts shaking and I thought, “Oh no, she’s shaking in pain like Chloe used to do.” Oh, I guess the lights were out and Sophie was trying to fall asleep and I was still reading and waiting for her to fall asleep. Anyway, a few seconds after Kylie was shaking, I smelled something. “I smell poop!” and I get up and put the dog down and stuff comes out of her onto Sophie’s floor and then the smell - it’s EVERYWHERE; I’m completely ENGULFED by it and I turn on the light and see poop splattered all over Sophie’s bed and I say, “I need help!” and Jeff comes out of Ethan’s room and gives me the barfiest look and I look down and LITERALLY MY ENTIRE SHIRT IS COVERED IN DOG POOP. 

I mean, I almost heaved right then and there. One of my favorite shirts too, that had a rip in it (a small one in one sleeve) but one I loved to throw on for stay-at-home days. And the worst part was it was a pull over so Sophie is freaking out because there is poop on her doll, on her sheets, on her comforter, and Jeff is like, “OhmyGod take off that shirt” and I take it off and almost cry/whine, “I have to shower!” and Jeff is like, “Why is that dear?” being silly. “Just throw the shirt out! Just throw it out!” Of course by this time Ethan is out of his room to see what all the ruckus was and Jeff banned the dog outside and Sophie came into my room and I strip down and hop in the shower to get clean and smelling pretty again and UGH. Oh by the way, it’s 9:45pm on a school night when all this goes down. OF COURSE. 

God bless Jeff. By the time I got out of the shower, he had Sophie’s bed stripped and the room fabreezed and the window open. I threw the stuff in the wash with a hefty dose of “Shout!” and set the washer soil setting to “HIGH.” Sophie ended up sleeping in my bed and Jeff in Ethan’s. Jeff brought Kylie’s crate into Ethan’s room and THANK GOD she is crate trained, that’s all I have to say. 

Anyway, Sophie has a clean room now but Kylie had her little issue (on a MUCH smaller scale) today so we are going to the vet later this afternoon. 

Boy she is really fucking lucky she is cute.

I Think I’ll Skip My Birthday This Year

I used to love, love LOVE my birthday! Back in the day we used to decorate each other’s cubes at work and go ALL OUT. I mean, balloons and crepe paper and streamers and signs and lots of fun things. Nobody does that any more at my office though we do get cake once a month. 

Jeff proposed to me on my birthday 2 years ago, so that was a good birthday. And last year I was in Jamaica on my honeymoon, though he SUCKS about birthdays and the resort had put a sign on our door saying Happy Birthday before he even realized and said it. But then all I had to do that day was drink from a coconut and sit on the beach, so….not at all bad. 

This year on my birthday we aren’t going anywhere but Sophie is performing in her Spring musical!

Anyway, I turn 38 in 16 days. Which means I’m much closer to 40. And I think I’ve been sorta having a mild ‘mid life crisis’ since last year. I just really don’t want to get older. Because each year I get older, I get more fat and more wrinkly and more tired. Always so, so tired. So I don’t know, I might just skip it. 

I love my husband and he is very kind. But celebrating birthdays is one thing he truly sucks at. Maybe that’ll be ok this year.

I don’t look forward to getting old but I do look forward to one day being empty nesters and moving somewhere that is warm ALL THE TIME. Oh well - that day will come, and in many ways it will be here before you know it. Though I have a feeling Sophie will live with us forever:)

What was your hardest birthday, and why?

Tuesday, March 03, 2015

Sneaky Monkey!

Kylie turned 9 months old on Sunday! She is as sweet and cuddly as can be when she’s tired. She often lays her head right on my neck so I can feel her breath on me. We spoon each other at night or she curls her belly toward me and I put my arms around her. I love it! When she’s awake though - WATCH OUT! She can practically jump as high as our counter and yesterday knocked a plate off; she will fetch a ball for three hours straight IN THE DARK and she loves the snow. 

The other day, Jeff was home and realized the dog hadn’t come back in so he went out in the yard looking for her and here is what he saw:

Yep, that’s Kylie, stuck, as she was trying to push through the fence so that she could go see Sophie’s BFF Taylor across the street, who was sledding with her brother in the front yard. It’s as if she thought, “How DARE those kids have fun without me!!”

She keeps us on our toes, that’s for sure!

Making Progress

I guess you could say the Prozac is helping a bit. Last month during PMS, I didn’t want to kill myself, just everyone around me, including my husband, dog and children. 

Well, not really.

But almost. No, not almost - I love my family and I would do anything to protect them. But everyone was annoying me and I was irritated by everything. And I threw a couple of temper tantrums, which I’m ashamed to admit because I am almost 38 years old for fuck’s sake (I DON’T WANT TO TURN 38!!!!) and this behavior is completely unacceptable. Sure, I berated myself and was filled with shame, but I didn’t want to kill myself because of it. 

See, progress!

Baby steps.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

My Sister's Birthday

Today is my "sister" Summar's birthday! Here is my note to her, posted on Facebook this morning:

Happy birthday dear friend. I've always been amazed by your artistic talent, jealous of your fashion sense, impressed by your intelligence, awed at your genuine sincerity of others, and absolutely blown away by your strength. I am blessed to have known you for the past 28 (!) years. I am thankful for your friendship and grateful for your sisterhood. I love you, sis!! xoxo